Year End Post:The summits and trenches of 2012 :-)

So the world didn't end on December 21, 2012 and here I am writing out my 'Year End Post' as usual! Every year I look forward to this time of the year when I get to do a quick flash-back on the year that was and relive the smiles and tears all over again in fast-forward mode. And usually, my regular 'Year End post' would be ready as soon as the last week of December set in. But this time around, the last two weeks of the year has been one of extreme sadness and mental turmoil. And I hope in earnest that such a year-end be a lifetime last. I hate to end things on a sad note. Some things are not under our discretion, though. All that can be done is to just hope for the best.

It would, however, be unfair if I said that the past year has just been sorrowful through and through. I did have my 'moments' too. Without any further ado, let's have a quick run-down,yeah?

Up in the clouds :)

1. Visited Varanasi after 30 years! It was an experience that deserves a blog entry dedicated to it. Loved every moment! :)
2. Shed a few pesky kilos that were just refusing to go away from me :)
3. Gave my first major presentation at work and got well-appreciated :)
4. Fell in love with Munnar all over again! :)
5. Got my very first anarkali salwar :P Was staying away from it for so long but a designer one was hard to resist :)
6. Got my very own personal camera for the first time! Yayy! :)
7. People I'd given up for lost came back into my life and many old friendships were rekindled :)
8. Had two major wardrobe additions - pencil heels and peep-toes! Woohoo! :)
9. Decided to start doing something creative...umm....well...at least I've decided to do it! :P :)
10. Blogging and some more blogging and a whole lot of appreciation! :)

Down in the dumps :(

1. Delhi rape case. Enough said. :(
2. Many old friends faded into the background of life in spite of my best efforts to keep them in view :(
3. The monsoons were a damp squib this time around :(
4. Lost a pet cat :(
5. The iPad never happened to me this year either :(
6. Missed the Doha International Book Fair this time too :(
7. Missed so many weddings of cousins and friends :(
8. Realized that I'm NEVER going to get that 'OM' tattoo done :(
9. The saga of being continually misunderstood continues :(
10. Some old wounds were cruelly reopened by insensitive individuals :(

Phew! That was tough. It's only when I started listing it out that I realized that I've had more prominent lows than highs last year. :( The list of 'highs' were actually more difficult to populate than the 'lows'. But then, I'm a firm believer in karma and in destiny. Whatever happened to me was for my good, whatever is happening to me is also for my good, and whatever is going to happen to me is for my good as well. Jeez! I almost forgot!! How could I be so rude? I'm running out of basic manners! :D Okay...I just want to thank all of my dear readers who painstakingly read through my blog posts and care enough to comment on them and send me notes of appreciation and criticism as well. My blog would not have been what it is today if it were not for all of you. Each one of my readers is special to me and it is your consistent encouragement that eggs me to go on and on. I do admit that I may have been politically incorrect in some of my blog-posts or even a tad biased towards my own point of view. But honestly...I have never meant to offend any sentiments nor hurt anybody. If have done so inadvertently, please do understand that it was truly unintentional and I am sorry too.

So that's that! I am stepping into the new year with renewed hope and dreams of a better tomorrow. Here's hoping that the coming year brings in a lot of happiness to my home and yours. May the Almighty bless your lives with every possible blessing. And may you have the power to spread the happiness and positive energy to everyone around you! :)

Wishing everybody a really Happy New Year!

Cheers and God Bless! :)

Better safe than happy?

The other day I was reading a book (I'm deliberately leaving out the name of the book coz I don't want people thinking that the subject of the book just might have influenced my thought process) and came across a line wherein the central character realizes that all her life, she has chosen to be safe than happy. I put down my book and thought about it. And sadly realized that I too have opted for something similar. Like many others.

To make sure my thoughts aren't prejudiced based on my own experiences, I posted this as a question to my Facebook friends. The results I got were a myriad of emotions hidden in a few intelligent comments. Most preferred to remain silent on the matter. Their answers were evident. Silence often speaks volumes, you see :)

I quote one of my own Facebook comments on the subject here:

People often opt for safety rather than happiness....Safety could be anything.....'emotional/psychological safety' (by being in a stable relationship even if there is no passion left in it), 'financial/occupational safety' (by holding onto a job just coz u're getting a regular paycheck even though it sucks the life out of you), 'physical safety' (by being around somebody who is physically stronger than you even though they are a pain to be around), 'social safety' (by adhering to seemingly senseless rules laid down by 'society' just coz you know you will be shunned if you dare disobey even though you don't personally approve of them), 'religious/spiritual safety' (by blindly following rules laid down aeons ago even if you don't understand WHY they were laid down and what sense it makes to be following them today), and even 'educational safety' (by joining for a course you loathe just coz it promises a 'safe' career option 3 or 4 years down the line)..............and such people seek 'happiness' in 'safety'.......while they know in the deepest areas of their conscience that THIS is not what they have truly wanted.....THIS is not being 'happy' in their personal dictionary....NO.

They hear of somebody else doing something they have always wanted to do and sigh....and within moments of their sojourn,they set about finding the negative sides of that person....in a way that they want to appease their own conscience that 'It's okay....you're not missing anything....if you'd done that,you'd have had a similar mess in your life too....you are happy now....you are happy now....you are HAPPY NOW!' 

Just coz u repeat something you want to believe to be true.....that doesn't make it the truth. :)

I thought about all the things and situations wherein I would have been truly happy. To be honest, I had a good laugh that ended in a sad sigh. They say it's good to dream. I think now I know why. In your dream world, everything is perfect...just the way you want it to be. Happiness everywhere...not a shred of sorrow or anger anywhere...no ropes that tie you down...a world where you can spread out your wings and fly with nobody to tell you that flying is sinful!

People who have chosen happiness over safety have often found themselves as social outcasts though. I recall my teenage now...a time when I used to express some of my dreams...I remember that my dreams and wishes used to get people unsettled a bit :) And then they'd chide me for trying to go 'against the flow' or by saying that I didn't drop down from outer space to harbor thoughts way beyond my cultural,social,financial,physical,etc. restrictions. I didn't quite understand things back then, to be honest. But now I reckon they said so because all they wanted me to have is a safe life. Forget about pursuing just happiness. She'll find happiness when she's safe. Different lines of thought. That's all. 

On my Facebook post, a couple of friends had asked me ' How can one be happy if one is not safe?'... This is the result of years of mental honing. The question makes perfect sense when you think about it within your own boundaries. But if you let your thoughts to escape those mental barbed wire fences, you'll see the answer for yourself. Happiness need not always mean safety (for definitions of safety in this context, scroll up)

Nevertheless,I do understand that to lead a 'normal' life, the majority of us have had to trade our happiness for safety. nothing wrong in that. Just pondering over our patterned lives.....that's all :)

Peace out!